WTF!?

Over the past year and I have I have started to suffer from panic attacks. They're really annoying and no fun at all, especially since there is never a logical reason for me to be panicking. Honestly, I'm a fairly happy person, I really don't stress myself out, save the panic attacks, so I don't know why they started or where they're coming from. Anyway, about a month or so ago, my doctor prescribed me to a medication called Klonopin. This medicine has completely helped me with my panic attacks, as well as my skewed sleeping schedule. No more going over 24 hours without a wink of sleep, which I think was probably more annoying than the panicking, to be quite honest with you. I wasn't really one to trust in medicines that mess with your serotonin levels, but this one has had no ill effects on me (thus far) whatsoever. BUT! I have been having very strange dreams lately. And I'm not talking strange like super out there, Yellow Submarine, type things. Usually, my dreams will include very familiar people in very familiar places, yet something is always off. It's like my mind changes things like the way a room looks or puts a house somewhere it's not supposed to be. Last night, I had a dream that one of my best friend's dorms was now located inside of a mall, and both of the cats my ex-boyfriend/? (more on that later) had acquired were there. It was odd, indeed. People will act differently, too. I guess it's like I'm having parallel universe-type dreams, but I always wake up saying "WTF!?"

Hm....

Sorry for the long break. My computer decided to comit suicide.

computer troubles.

I'll be back soon. :[

for the past three days...

I have had the song "Rock Lobster" by the B-52's stuck in my head. Why? I'm not positive, since I don't even recall hearing it recently, but it just won't go away. Needless to say, most of the B-52's music just cracks me up so I find it most enjoyable, but three days!? And I can't even remember all the words. I hate that! So, I've finally given in, and here's a little "Rock Lobster" for all of us to enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vgIdIwSz16c

It wasn't a rock...it was a ROCK LOBSTER!

seriously?

I was browsing my Google home page and my top search queries. This one is by far the greatest: Why do hot things melt other things?

Ok, firstly, why does that come to my page? Secondly, who is asking that question? I really hope it's a curious child using daddy's computer at work. I mean, even if someone was interested in the scientific side of why higher temperatures melt substances, I wouldn't assume they'd word it the way this was. You know, with proliferous use of the word "things." Gosh, some people.

Exams are over, by the way, so no more stress and way more blogging!

the end.

My boyfriend and I are on a break. We've been together for quite sometime, and I'm sad to say that it doesn't bother me that we're not right now. There's just something missing, I know what it is, but he can't seem to understand it.

Oh, well.

anxiety.

Sorry for the lack of entertaining, humorous, and downright weird posts lately. I've just been pretty damn stressed out. I'll be back up to standard shortly, though, no worries.

middle school drugs.

I'm sick. I've been sick for a couple of weeks now, actually, but I've just now accepted that I'm sick and I have to do something about it. It's your basic congestion based illness. Stuffy nose, cough, swollen glands, etc. Not a lot of fun and seems to last forever. So last night my boyfriend finally convinced me to take some Nyquill and get it over with, so obviously I did. I think I took too much and about had a DXM trip. The kids these days call it Robo-tripping. I kid you not, when I got my boyfriend to drive me to the grocery store so I could get something to eat, I was stumbling and slurring my words. Everything looked brighter and strange. It was just not right. Not right! I just wanted to clear out my nose and get some sleep, not have a mind altering experience. Good lord.

I mean, I was literally walking down the cereal aisle looking like a crackhead. Wearing my pajamas, mouth hanging open, not knowing what to look like. My boyfriend thought it was hilarious, but if I had been in a state of mind to see how I was acting, I would not have. I'm sure people in there were like "What the fuck is this chick on...?" Luckily I'm not from a small town so people won't "talk" and spread it around about that "Robb girl who's on drugs!" In fact, I'm pretty sure that most of my neighbors are or have been on drugs at some point so I'm hoping I didn't stand out too much from my little accidental overdose. Oh well, I got something to eat and immediately fell asleep afterward and am feeling much better this morning so hopefully I won't have any more escapades into the world of dextromethorphan psychosis.

I am outraged...

...because of this "Blogger Outage" that is scheduled. You see, I was planning a post for those exact ten minutes between 2 and 2:10 am on Thursday morning. Thanks a lot, Blogger!

melting pot.

Yesterday was my boyfriend and I's one year anniversary. Wanting to do something special, he took me to the Melting Pot and we feasted on a seemingly never-ending fondue meal. Needless to say, I enjoyed it. I still feel full. Our appetizer consisted of a cheese fondue that was three different cheeses, I believe, with garlic, pesto, tomatoes, and wine. Oh, my GOD. It was delicious, but wait, there's more! We were next supplied with a salad of mixed greens, a WHOLE sliced tomato, mozzarella cheese, and the strongest balsamic dressing I have ever encountered in my life. Seriously, that stuff cleared out my sinuses hardcore. Our entree was assorted raw meats that we personally cooked in another fondue concoction. These meats included lobster, fillet mignon, sirloin, chicken, shrimp, and pork. You know, if I didn't feel out of place at this restaurant already, that selection definitely did it. But it was also 100% delicious and I enjoyed myself thoroughly. I'm not the biggest fan of fruity drinks, but I accompanied my meal with a signature cocktail called Basil Strawberry Lemonade, made with crushed basil, strangely, and strawberries, lemonade, and Strawberry Smirnoff. It really wasn't bad at all, as weird as it sounds. Honestly, at this point, I didn't think I'd have room for desert, but since that was the whole reason I wanted to come, I made room. This chocolate fondue had peanut butter in it, and it was amazing. Orgasmic, even. I stuffed my face, that's for sure. I also ordered and after dinner coffee drink called Cafe Reggae. Now, I've made drinks like this before, so let me tell you I was a little shocked when I took my first sip and it tasted like straight rum. I really couldn't taste any of the other ingredients at all, it just tasted like hot rum. Where's the coffee!? Anyway, the bartender, on his way to the restroom, walks up to us as I'm taking a sip and says "You're welcome! I really dumped it in there." All I could cleverly respond with was "Yeah, I can tell!" Anyway, it was better as I drank more and the whipped cream on top mixed with the rest. Anyway, at this point my boyfriend and myself were on the verge of popping so we decided to call it a night and enjoyed a thoroughly uncomfortable ride home. All in all, it was a great anniversary and I would definitely go back, though I might forgo eating for a few days before hand.

mystery.

So looking through my closet today for some comfortable sneakers to wear, I noticed something odd: all of my shoelaces are gone. I really don't know what happened to them all. I mean, it's so weird to think that every single pair of shoes I have, outside of my work shoes, are missing shoelaces. You'd think that they'd at least be somewhere in the house, but alas, no. I can't find them anywhere. This is very frustrating because I really need shoelaces to wear any of these shoes. I don' t really want to wear flip flops or heels at the moment, which is why I was looking for sneakers. I have no theories as to what happened to all of my shoelaces. Perhaps I just took them out and lost them one by one? Why would I take them out in the first place, though? I'm so confused by this! Maybe the underpants gnomes from South Park have switched to my shoe laces, though that seems even more unlikely. Honestly, I do not want to go spend money on a bunch of shoelaces because all of mine have disappeared. How frustrating.

On a lighter note, I have just invested in a bunch of new art supplies so I can go back to my first love. Did I mention that I was an artist? Well, I love it. I'm not so inclined to sculpture and 3D art, not that I don't appreaciate it, I'm just not very good at it. I did learn how to blow glass beads not too long ago, however. It's so fun. I want to get much better at glass blowing so I can create a bunch of different things, including more advanced beads all the way up to diningware and beyond. But, right now, I'm going to stick to my talents which are drawing, painting, printmaking, mixed media, etc. etc. It's a great stress reliever for me and I've been finding myself getting distracted and doodling so much lately that I felt I really needed to start back with some side art projects.

Also, upcoming soon, I hope, is an interview I did with the Mayor of Wingville. Be sure to check that out! You'll get to learn more about me in all my nerdy glory.

disney.

I've got a bone to pick with you! Now, don't get me wrong, I grew up with and love Disney movies. However, in my older and wiser years I have noticed a disturbing pattern that they all seem to have in common: they hate single moms! Think about it, really think about it, how many single moms are there in Disney movies? Two that I can think of, and guess what? They're evil stepmothers! All the other Disney movies either have both parents, whom you don't see much of, or a single dad. In fact, I've compiled a list for you:

The Little Mermaid, single dad.
A Goofy Movie, single dad.
Pocahontas, single dad.
The Great Mouse Detective, single dad.
Pinocchio, kind of a stretch, but essentially...single dad.
Finding Nemo, single dad.
The Wild, single dad.
And you know what? Hannah Montana, single dad!

And what's more!
Cinderella, evil stepmother.
Snow White, evil stepmother!

And of course, what did they do to Bambi's mom? Shot her.
I rest my case. Disney consists of nothing but a bunch of matricidal maniacs.

the 28 days later thing.

So I mentioned in my first post that I will fight tooth and nail with anyone who wants to tell me that 28 Days Later is a zombie movie. That being said, that is not the only problem I have with the film. And since I have this argument with people all the time, especially my boyfriend and his idiotic friends, I thought I'd put into writing all my arguments on the British gore-fest that is 28 Days Later.

Firstly, it is not a zombie movie. Zombies, by definition, are bodies that physiologically dead, but reanimated as flesh eating terrors that do not recognize nor resemble anything of their past life (when they were actually ALIVE, people!) In 28 Days Later and it's subsequent sequel, the "infected" are sufferers of a virus called rage, which is similar to rabies in nature and causes the infected person to be not only incredibly sick, but also to exhibit extremely violent behavior. Some might say "Well, A., what about when the "infected" and biting the skin of their victims?" My answer to you is that when angered to the point of a violent rage, you will do anything you can to hurt and kill your intended victim. If that means kicking, punching, scratching, biting, and whatever else may come to your mind at the time, that is what you'll do. If you notice, the violence ends once the victim is dead and the infected person moves on to another victim. They do not stick around and eat and the victim does not rise from the dead in zombie fashion, they remain dead.

On the DVD commentary, director Danny Boyle classifies the film as an apocolyptic, horror and zombie film. Two out of three isn't bad, Mr. Boyle! He had before stated, however, that he didn't want it to be labled as such and that his true inspiration for the movie was from John Wyndham's novel The Day of the Triffids. For those unfamiliar with this particular book, it tells the tale of these giant plants with animal like behavior that enjoy the fine culinary taste of rotting meat, who have taken over the planet, somehow, and of a meteor shower that has rendered most of the inhabitants of earth blind. A group of "sighted" survivors works together, sometimes, to remain living throughout the catastrophe. It sounds very strange, but it is actually a pretty good book. It also helped to inspire the book Blindness which was released as a movie just last year. ANYWAY, as that book is not about zombies, I don't know how it could inspire a zombie film.

Another thing my boyfriend said that annoys me is that the movie I Am Legend was a rip-off of 28 Days Later. OK. Maybe Will Smith's Robert Neville wasn't the greatest, but that is still a completely unfair statement. The movie I Am Legend is based off of Richard Matheson's novel of the same name. Which, might I add, was published in 1954. That is well before 28 Days Later was written, or even thought of for that matter! It's ok, I too defend the movies that I love, but I can at least back up my defense. Perhaps I just spend too much time reading? Oh, well.

question?

Does it creep anyone else out that the Pottery Barn Kids logo is a boy with a lampshade on his head?

amazing.

This is the best. You all know about my issue with zombies, well this blog is amazing. I love it already. Having read The Zombie Survival Guide and agreeing that I should brush up on my defense training, this woman is now one of my heroes. THANKS, DUDE!

http://www.zombiedefense.blogspot.com/

earth hour.

Don't forget! 8.30 to 9.30 tonight! Turn it off, light a candle! Celebrate Earth and live proactively.

breaking news.

So I'm sure we all remember when the "Dude, you're getting a Dell!" guy was busted for marijuana, but this is even better! We've all seen those annoying Shamwow! commercials. My signifigant other's bible thumping dad even bought some of them to clean off his bike. Well Vince Shlomi, aka the Shamwow! guy has been arrested for beating up a hooker. Go figure.

His story is that the lovely lady bit his tongue while they kissed and he had to punch her to get her to let go. Hm...

Though they were both arrested for aggravated battery, apparently neither Shlomi nor the prostitute are having formal charges filed against them at this time.

Well, you know what Shamwow! guy? I don't think anybody loves your nuts.

beyonce.

I would like to take the time to talk about Beyonce's song "I'm a Diva." It's a very catchy song, yes, but there's a few things I'd like to clear up. No. A diva is NOT a female version of a hustler. Of a, of a hustler. In fact, if we want to get technical with it, a diva is actually the same thing as a prima donna, which is the starring female of an opera. I don't know many hustlers that sing opera, do you? And like my good friend said "Just because she married Jay-Z does not give her the right to rap now." And if you're going to rap, Beyonce, at least be truthful. Because once again! A diva and a hustler are not the same thing, male or female. Thanks for your time, people.

missed connections.

I often browse through the missed connections section of Craig's List to read what people say. I get bored sometimes, it's something to do! Anyway, I never take those things seriously or anything because I don't ever feel like I saw someone, somewhere, who was worth scourging the internet for. It also seems a little stalker-ish to me. However, today I saw a really gorgeous guy and I didn't get the chance to talk to him. It really is a shame, but maybe he doesn't think Craig's List is stalker-ish? But if he did post a missed connection, I wonder if I'd still be attracted to him knowing he scourged the internet for me? It's quite the conondrum. I think I'll just leave things up to fate.

it just occured to me...

...how annoying I find it when people constantly use the word "literally," as in "I literally just got here." OR "I literally couldn't believe that he said that. Literally!" What did you think? I thought you had "figuratively" just gotten there? Come on, now.

top ten: urinals.

I was browsing around the internet, procrastinating doing anything productive, and I stumbled across this list of the top ten urinals around the world. Oh. Man. Check them out:

10. The Felix is apparently a very trendy bar/restaurant located in the Peninsula Hotel in Hong Kong. Obviously, this is a very stylishly designed granite urinal. Very modern. Oh, wait, it's also equipped with a view of the cityscape. WOW! Beautiful! I wish I could see an incredibly lit cityscape when I were peeing. Another fun fact about this is that there used to not be actual urinals in the restaurant's bathroom. There was just the glass wall with draining mechanisms so you could actually pee ON the beautiful view. Very innovative, Hong Kong!

9. This one is located a little closer to home. Located in Sheboygan, Wisconsin's Kohler Arts Center is this incredibly decorated urinal. In fact, each seperate urinal is decorated in a different manner. I guess the theme so far is having something interesting to look at while you pee? I don't know, but I like their style in Sheboygan. Or maybe I just like saying "Sheboygan." Who knows!? Anyway, these urinals were designed by Matt Nolen, a New York artist. Each different urinal, aswell as the stalls, sinks, and walls, are suppose to depict changing architectural styles from ancient Egypt to the present. Who knew that you could actually get a history lesson because you drank too much sweet tea at lunch?

8. Talk about getting in touch with nature! These urinals are located in Thailand's Phi Phi Islands National Park. The island of Phi Phi Le, on which the park is located, is only 6.6 kilometers in area total. The park is also host to many popular beaches and the movie The Beach was actually filmed there. Go figure? I wonder if Leo used the urinals? When I think of National Parks I think of wholesome family fun. So let's just imagine for a second we're having a nice day at Yellowstone, enjoying the fresh air, and you happen to walk past the restroom...which is outdoors. That would probably scar my childhood a little, don't you think? I mean, really, if you're going to pee in the woods, what is the point of plumbing? Honestly...just pee in the woods! People do it every day when they go camping. Suck it up.

7. This one says that the purpose of this design was to make the visitor feek as though they were "standing amidst the flowers in a Swedish meadow." Tell me guys, would it be easier for you to take a piss "standing amidst the flowers in a Swedish meadow"? This men's restroom is in Terminal 5 of Stockhom-Arlanda Airport in Stockholm, Sweden. I know the airport isn't necessarily a place we'd want to be, given the amount of time you have to spend there these days, but does it really affect your ability to pee? Really? I mean, I guess that's nice of them to put your feelings into consideration, but how did they conduct the research for this. "Excuse me, sir, but if you had the choice of anywhere to pee, where would it be?" "Well, I'd have to say amidst the flowers of a Swedish meadow, my good man." "Ah, yes, we've gotten that a lot today. Thank you for your time and good day, sir!"

6. HOLY SHIT. This is just troubling. Urinals are for men, but how about a urinal for women? A Dairy Queen in Port Charlotte, Florida has done just this. A urinal...for women! For women!? Insanity. I guess it's for all those crazies who have always wanted to know what it's like to pee standing up? This looks like a space contraption though. I guess a lot of engineers worked tirelessly on this design. Honestly, though, this seems so gross to me. For the same reason you wear underwear when trying on bikinis at Target. Ugh.

5. St. Christopher's at the Winston located in Amsterdam is what I like to call a "Creepy Fetishists Paradise." They call it an artistically decorated hostel, but I guess we can agree to disagree? The hotel has a room called the "Exotic and Fetish Room." Come on, people! Anyway, these urinals are located in a bar that opened in the hostel in 2006. They're called "kisses" urinals. Ew. Like I said, they're for the creepy fetishists who want to legally pee in a woman's mouth, I suppose. If I were a guy, I'd feel so wrong using this bathroom. So, so, so wrong. Did I mention St. Christopher's also has a Body Fat room? Weird.

4. FANCY! The Urinals of Rothesay located on the Isle of Bute, which is off the west coast of Scotland, are Victorian style...marble...basically, the urinals you'd see in a millionaire dream, I guess? Just like the above, I'd feel wrong peeing here, but for a different reason. I just wouldn't want to mess anything up in there. I'm not a guy, so it's not an issue. The island used to be a popular stop on Victorian island cruises. Prince Charles recently visited here as part of his official itinerary! Like I said, fancy. I forgot something, they call it the "loo." I love it.

3. These are so awesome. Urinals...designed as flowers? Oh, man. They're actually very pretty sculptural pieces and then I remember that they're part of a bathroom fixture. They were created by San Francisco artist Clark Sorensen. They are all unique, hand made, and fully functioning. I sound like I'm doing an advertisement, don't I? Here's the link for all the pictures. http://www.urinal.net/naturescall/

2. Check out the Taj Mahal, folks. You know, it never occurred to me that a tomb would have urinals, but I guess a tomb can have urinals. Not only does this tomb have urinals, but they're environmentally conscious aswell! They use waterless urinals to preserve our water supply. Way to go, guys!

1. I guess what makes this one so interesting isn't what it is, but where it is. It is located on the Amundsen-Scott South Pole Station. That's right people, the South Pole. Those researchers have to pee, too! The station is located 350 meters from the geographical south pole and drifts nearer at a rate of 10 meters per year. Antartica is the highest, driest, and coldest continent on the earth. The continent itself is not only the middle of nowhere, it is nowhere. It's miles from nowhere. Those men who built it in that environment were very noble. Very noble, indeed.

So there you have it. The top ten most fascinating urinals according to the internet community. Do I agree with the order, necessarily? No. But it's up to yourself to decide which is most interesting to you. In fact, you may find this post 100% disgusting. To each his own! I thought it was hilarious.

skateboard.

I have officially decided to get serious about my street and park tricks. For the most part, I just cruise around. I can do a few simple things here and there, but definitely no breakout talent. I mean, I actually like skating so I'm ready to challenge myself a little bit. However, I need a new board. The one I have is really awesome, because I designed it, but it's not necessarily built for learning tricks, that is to say, crashing and burning a lot. I'm in the process of deciding what kind of board to get that isn't too expensive, but is sturdy enough to take a beating, but also has a graphic I like aswell. Picky, picky, picky! I'll update you as the search goes on.

disturbing news.

I just found out that I can't get FUEL TV because Comcast doesn't provide it. I'm really upset about this because I've been trying to get this channel for months. I don't want to have to change my whole service because of one channel, but this is really ridiculous. I've already sent a message to Comcast requesting that they add FUEL to their menu, but, alas, it probably won't happen. Boo.

literary witch hunt.

So I read the American Library Association's list of the most challenged books and it made me sick. I have a HUGE problem with book banning. I want to know why people don't trust readers and why it's such a big deal for people to have creative freedom with their writing. What really gets me though is that a lot of the people who challenge books have never even read the books they deem "dangerous" or "inappropriate." In a lot of cases, the books might have a message you could identify with if you didn't take them so literally. I think it's nonsense to assume that a book will put dangerous notions in some one's mind and especially when these things aren't dangerous in any way at all, which you would know if you actually possessed an imagination.

All I can really say is that if I ever write a book, I hope someone finds it offensive enough to get on this list because then I know for a fact people will read it. And I'll still make money if people go out and buy it just to set it on fire. YOU LOSE! HA!

That's my rant for the day. Here's the link:
http://www.ala.org/ala/aboutala/offices/oif/bannedbooksweek/bbwlists/TOP_100_in_2000_2007.pdf

Now what happened...

...to my Nosferatu picture!? The Emperor came back, but now Nosferatu is gone. Cheese and rice.

Well, I have strep folks. I have yet to talk to my manager because I went to the hospital today before my shift because my fever was out of control, and I'm sure they're pretty pissed that I haven't talked to them yet and I'll get written up for "No Call, No Show." Ugh. Well, my fever is down, yet still present, and it hurts to swallow, but I'll live. I just dred having to wake up to call up the manager tomorrow and explain my situation. It's just such a burden to know they're going to be mad even though there wasn't a lot I could do about it.

interesting facts.

So there are a lot of nerdy things about me and here's one more: I love my Rubik's Cube. I play with it all the time, I even tried to teach one of my tables how to do it today. It's really fun for me because it gives me something to do with my hands. My solving time right now is about 5-10 minutes, but I want to get it under a minute. I'm working on it! It sucks when I have to show other people because they always distract me and I lose my place and have to start over. Ha! Anyway, that's another interesting fact about Hooters Girl A. Robb for you.

what happened...

...to my Palpatine picture!? Blah.

So at our Hooters for St. Patricks Day they've decided that we have to have a "schoolgirl" theme. That sucks, because I can't find a short black or plaid pleated skirt to wear. I wish that they'd give us a little more option of what to wear. Ugh. I hope I can find something soon! AH!

What else...

I'm thinking about doing the bikini contest this year. I don't know, though. I have until May to decide, but it'll come up on me fast, I'm sure. Hm. I don't know. There's a lot of competition and you put a lot of work into doing your hair and your makeup and covering your body in oil or glitter and trying to get into shape...Is it worth it? I'm not sure yet. I'll decide later.

when I look up at the stars...

...I always wonder, "Wow. Space is so massive, and we're such a small piece in it. HOW IN THE HELL CAN PEOPLE NOT BELIEVE IN ALIENS!?"

True story.

my opinion on the Hooters Menu Test.

I think it's great that all the girls have to take this test because it really helps you relate the menu to your guests and make suggestions, HOWEVER, I think it should be split up into sections. It's very long and very tedious. Really, just a lot of information for a girl to learn so quickly. I think girls would pass it much easier if we split it up into sections like "Sandwhiches" and "Soups and Salads" and "Hooters Bar" etc. etc. I've talked to my GM about this. He said "We'll see."

top ten: scariest movie characters.

I make a lot of lists. Usually when I'm bored, or just have a thought. I'll most likely post all of these up here. Today, as I'm sitting inside watching it snow outside I've decided to introduce you all to the world of A. Robb's Top Tens. Today we will explore the top ten most frightening movie characters of all time, in my opinion. Not only will I list them, I'll tell you why.

I am an avid fan of horror movies, but suprisingly enough not all of the characters on my list are from the horror genre. This, to me, does not make them any less terrifying.

10. The Firefly Family.

House of 1000 Corpses is the first and only movie I have ever watched where I actually yelled at the screen. The scariest thing about the movie, besides the Family which I will discuss in a second, is the fact that there is no hope for the protagonists of the story. It's really 4 college students lost out in the boonies, trapped by a family of serial killers. Not the kind of scenario I'd want to be in, really. I did like Captain Spaulding, though. Hilarious.


9. Jaws.

When I was little, everytime I would go underwater and close my eyes I'd see a shark in my head. I don't know why this was, but it happened every time. Even in swimming pools. Even in the bathtub! So you can imagine what the idea of a giant shark terrorizing the tourist filled beaches would do to a young girl with a vivid and entirely ridiculous imagination.

8. Nosferatu.
In my AP art class back in high school my portfolio "theme" was Dreams and Nightmares. One of the pictures I painted was a man standing in the door frame, casting a shadow of a creature. The scariest sillhouete I could think of was that of Nosferatu. The original vampire movie is probably the most terrifying to me. It was actually banned in Sweden upon it's release because the character was deemed to frightening for audiences.

7. Papa Jupiter and Big Brain.

Obviously I'll find The Hills Have Eyes disturbing because I have a problem with getting eaten, which you'll notice from my fear of zombies, but what really got me was the desert. I've driven through the desert to the Grand Canyon and there's no place to go. No help to be found. You're basically screwed. Pretty much all the characters in this movie were frightening, but these two in particular made my skin crawl. Jupiter was the ruthless ringleader of the clan, showing no remore for rape, murder, and cannibalism; rallying all of the "community" to his cause. And Big Brain, though not on screen for an enormous amount of time, just gave me chills. His grotesque appearance and his insane laughter just got to me. Ugh.

6. Annie Wilkes.

So imagine you're a bestselling author and your biggest female fan kidnapps you. She seems to have a kind and cheerful demeanor and then something snaps. You see that she is actually a psychopath who is convinced she is helping you by breaking your legs with a mallet. Go figure.

5. John Doe.

Oh, Kevin Spacey. You made my skin crawl in Seven. The scary thing about this character is that he's so calm, he's so reserved, he's not some big, running creature weilding a knife or a chainsaw. His murders are calculated and it was all a master plan that came to an end when you had Brad Pitt's character kill him completing the sins of wrath and envy. The thought of a man cutting off his own fingertips everyday to get rid of his fingerprints in just disturbing beyond definition and I think this one will be a favorite of mine forever.

4. Damien.

The Omen scares me everytime I watch it. Creepy little kids just get to me and he was the original. Between Damien and Isaac from Children of the Corn, I just get this creepy feeling that maybe there are some scary little kids somewhere worshipping the devil and killing off their parents. Anyway, Damien scares me so much because he could be any kid on the playground. Everything about him would seem normal to an outside view. Watching the boy grow up through the movies, there were a lot of mysterious things happening around him and it was scariest because it seemed that no one could stop him. Anyone who knew or even suspected what he was ended up dead. His smile was even scarier than his usual somber look.

3. The Penguin.

If anyone asked me if I thought Danny DeVito was scary, I'd probably just laugh. But then there's the curious case of Batman Returns. Oh. My. God. His physique, his demeanor, his history. Everything about this character disturbed me as a child, and even now. Tim Burton is a genius in all that he does. He adds his creepy flair to it and it just chills. Originally, the penguin was just a short, fat, beak-nosed rich man who was bullied as a child and became a political strategist. In Burton's film, he is just a deformed sociopath. His parents through him into the sewers. I think his image might haunt many people's nightmares.

2. It.

The reason "It" is so scary is because "It" is fear itself. It's whatever you fear most. So imagine your childhood haunted by your greatest fear and all of a sudden that fear turns up again in your adulthood to haunt you once more. And to top that off, all of your friends whwo experienced "It" with you growing up start to die one by one. So would you hunt it down and try to rid yourselves of this curse forever or just try your damnedest to avoid "It." I don't know, really. Creepy clown, to top it off.

1. The Emperor.
So I'm obviously a huge Star Wars fan, but you don't have to be all that into it to agree the the Emperor is scary. Not only is he physically disturbing, but he is just the embodiment of evil. Of course, everyone who hasn't seen the movies is like "Oh, Darth Vader is the bad guy, right? Right?" WRONG. The Emperor is the one who is behind everything. Every killing, every evil deed. And his eyes just creep me the F. out, peeping out behind that hood. Even his teeth are scary! The way he talks just gets to me. I honestly get scared after watching Revenge of the Sith in the dark, which is so sad, but true! Good god. For sure, my scariest movie character of all time. Well done, George.

So there you have it. Feel free to contribute characters you find terrifying.

work.

It really annoys me when people are staring in the windows at 10.30 when they know quite well that we don't open until 11. Look, folks, we have to make sure the restaurant is prepared to serve you because we wouldn't want your service to be terrible. Please be patient and just wait until 11. That's when I consider lunch time to start, anyway, so you'll be alright I think.

work.

So my feet are killing me today because I just got new, very white shoes. I love them because I don't have to clean my old nasty ones anymore, but they need to be broken in for sure. On the bright side, I love free meals for training!

Hope everyone's having a lovely night.

Happy Birthday, Dr. Seuss!

It's Dr. Seuss's birthday!

I've been meaning to buy some of those books....

snow.

So I woke up to find it snowing. That's incredibly strange in my part of the world, let me tell you. Especially since it waited until March to happen. So much for a winter wonderland. More like a spring break wonderland.

harry potter and the double entendre.

I am not ashamed to admit that I have read the Harry Potter series multiple times. I feel that I pick up things I missed every time I read them, and I specifically ( because I do this with everything) find a lot of sentences that could be, well, suggestive. Now, I hardly think that lots of little children interpret things that way and I really doubt J.K. Rowling did it on purpose, though who knows, but I can find a sexual innuendo in anything. I guess it's because I hang out with guys too much. Anyway, here are some of my favorites:

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets
"Whoops, my wand is a little over-excited." -Professor Lockhart.

Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
"Something silver white, something enormous erupted from the end of his wand."

"Can I have a look at Uranus, too, Lavender?" - Ron.

"Yeh've got to stroke 'em." -Hagrid.

"Hermione's mouth was slightly open after Harry had finished."

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
"Big bones. I'll give her big bones!" - Hagrid.

"Can I have a look at Uranus, too, Lavender?" -Ron.

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
"What do you mean I'm not brave in bed?" -Harry.

"But whether James really did take off Snape's pants, Harry never knew."

"Harry's heart began to pump very fast. Defense against external penetration?"

"Which left Harry free to sit on the grass and watch the foursome under the tree."

"Yeah, Montague tried to do us during break." -Fred.

"He came last night, when you were in bed." -Ron.

"Was it...was it you know what, darling? Did he use his- thing?" -Petunia.

"I know you did Mark Evans two nights ago."
"He was asking for it!" -Harry and Dudley."

"Quite astonishing the way you contrive to wriggle out of very tight holes." -Snape.

"... every part of him screaming for release, Harry felt the creature use him again..."

"Fred and I managed to keep our peckers up somehow" -George (British version!)

"Ha ha ha, Harry, look at it--" said Ron, watching it disgorge its gaudy innards. "Harry, come and touch it, bet it's weird--"..."Harry, look what's happen--no--no, I don't like it--no, stop--stop--"

"One more lesson like that and I might just do a Weasley."

"...the handle's made of Spanish oak with anti-jinx varnish and in-built vibration controls..."- Ron.

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
"I need to see what Draco Malfoy is doing inside you." -Harry.

"Maybe it's better if you do it yourself. I didn't enjoy it when Dumbledore took me along for the ride." - Harry.

"You remind me of James. He called it my 'furry little problem' in company." -Lupin.

"You will not object to getting a little wet?" -Dumbledore.


I know there's plenty I missed. I haven't read Sorcerer's Stone in a while and I need to skim through Deathly Hallows, but that's plenty for now I'd say.
Now, I don't want anyone to get all mad and offended by these, it's just how I perceive things sometimes. But what I do know is that I'm not the only one who sees these innuendos, so don't get all in a tizzy.

interesting facts.

I have a legitimate fear of zombies. I really don't know where this developed from, honestly. I suppose everyone is entitled to one irrational fear and at least I don't take it to the extreme of barracading myself in my house every night while maintaining my stock of unperishible food and ammunition, but it really does get to me that I even have these thoughts. I always say to myself "Well, A. You do know the unliklihood of this ever happening?" and then I respond "Yeah...but what if?" When you think about it, if the situation ever arises, it will be very difficult to survive. Sure, when you think about it logically, a zombie couldn't be the sprinting monsters of the re-vamped Dawn of the Dead seeing as dead bodies tend to be stiff, but the slow zombies get you, too, and to me that's just as scary. All I hope is that this random fear doesn't cause me to lose my mind and build a zombie-proof safe house one day, sleeping with a rifle next to my bed.

At least the people I know now are on my side. My boyfriend bought me a 10 pack of shooting targets with zombies on them and treated me to a trip to the indoor shooting range. At least I know the art of the zombie head shot now and will be prepared if I don't lose my grip under pressure.

Sure, people think I'm absolutely nuts. I think I'm crazy! But the fear is there and I guess I'll just have to wait until I grow out of it because I can't seem to get rid of it. All I can do is hope it doesn't get worse and I become that "crazy lady down the street." You know, the one that never goes outside and doesn't let people in? Oh, god.

Random: I will fight tooth and nail with you over the fact that 28 Days Later is not a zombie movie.